Kigeme

So we arrived safely in Kigeme on Sunday after another epic journey through Nyongwe forest. 

During the rest of our time in Cyangugu...
- we visited some local schools where we did praise and worship with the kids (I say kids, one of the schools was 250 teenage boys).  We did a short play on the prodigal son, some singing (still no where near as good as they are!) and joined in with the dancing.  All a bit scary, but good fun.
- Worked in e tree nursery
- Sat by the river and looked across to the Congo on the other side.  Lake Kivu is beautiful and it was so nice to be beside water again.
- Visited a lady supported by RDIS.  She prayed for a roof for her house and had her prayers answered when the church decided to support her and help put a roof on her house.  Certainly challenged me over what I pray for - God can answer big and small prayers.
- I bought some more fabric from the market - the fabric here is amazing, so colourful!
- I felt challenged over my attitudes towards difficult people and how I deal with others.  I want to be a kind and gentle person and instead feel like I'm too cynical and serious.
- We took part in umuganda (the Saturday community day) - it's amazing to see a community come together for the morning.  We were moving stones/ rocks to be used for the foundation for a new church building as their existing building has been condemned.  All those hours spent moving delivery boxes in the shop have finally paid off!  It was good to get involved and show that white girls can work hard!
- We stayed in a lovely house with sofas, which I definitely appreciated.

We're staying in Nyamagabe in Kigeme Diocese.  It's certainly colder than Cyangugu (although today is very hot).  The guesthouse isn't as nice, but is still fine - we are always looked after and welcomed wherever we go.  So far we've looked round some projects, including a really inspiring community who grow crops together and split the profits/ food.  I feel challenged to do more work in the community when I get home.  This morning we were teaching in a local high school (a lesson on conjunctions, hope you're proud mum!) and will be teaching again tomorrow and Friday.  I was feeling sick with nerves beforehand but thankfully we weren't teaching on our own, which made a massive difference.  We also had a rat in the dining room of the guesthouse the other night, which was both horrible and very entertaining!

Prayer points would be:
- For a good time in Kigeme.  We're here till the 7th June, then go back to Cyakabiri for the last month.
- I have a swollen foot - possibly an infection or allergic reaction to an insect bite. Either way it's not very pleasant and would be good if it went back to normal.
- I've been thinking more about my character and who I want to be (or rather who God wants me to be).  I feel I need to change but am not sure how to.
- On a similar note, I'd like to be better at choosing to make myself heard and seen.  But also looking for those who also feel unseen and unheard.


Thanks again to those who read the blog - I really appreciate it!  If you were thinking of writing to me, I'd say best not to post anything after this week as it takes about a month for me to get anything, and I only have just over 5 weeks left here.  Hope all is well at home - I hear it's been hot! xx

Muraho Cyangugu!

So we arrived safely in Cyangugu on Friday.  In the morning we went for a last walk round the university campus and saw some monkeys.  Can't imagine going to a uni where monkeys just roam around the campus!  Being around students and young people all week made me realise how much I miss that community and fellowship you have as a student.  Life can pretty lonely in Stirling, and that's one thing I'm not looking forward to when I get home.  It's also so good to spend time with the girls on the team - I'm so grateful that we get on as well as we do.

On the journey to Cyangugu we travelled through Nyunwe forest - a very twisty road and I spent most of the journey through the forest with my head out of the window - a lot of fun!  We saw another monkey there too.  It's not as rural here in Cyangugu as I thought it would be, but still quite a different feel from Butare and Cyakabiri/ Muhanga.  We can see across Lake Kivu to the DRC and on Saturday went to the border.  (don't worry parents, we didn't go in!)  We also saw the hills of Burundi and visited a hot spring.

Cyangugu isn't without it's challenges.  I feel very insecure here, more so than the other places we've stayed and feel very judged for being a quiet person.  I can't sing, dance or play sport.  I'm not good at talking to people I don't know and I'm not good at speaking up in conversations.  I know I need to put these worries aside and focus on the things I'm good at/ can do (....what are they again?!...) but it's hard.

Thanks to Dianne Y and Gill F for the post - lovely to hear from home.

Farewell Butare

In my previous blog post I mentioned being challenged by some of the things I've seen here in Rwanda.  A couple of weeks ago we visited a lady helped by the Transform team from 2011.  She lives in a fairly basic house, built from wood, mud, stones and cement with 3 of her children.  She cooks inside the house using eucalyptus leaves as she can't afford charcoal, but has to keep a close eye on the fire as the leaves are very flammable.  During the day her 3 goats live outside, but at night they are kept in the 'kitchen' in order to keep them safe.  Understandably this makes the house smell.  She was very grateful to God for providing for her, and thanked us for taking the time to visit her.

This week in Butare we have been helping another woman and her 4 children with building a new home for them.  They used to live in a grass house but this was destroyed making them homeless, so for the past 7 months they have been living in the local church.  A plot of land was found for them and they built the frame of the house using branches and bits of wood.  The walls were then filled in with mud and we've been helping by putting another layer of mud both inside and outside.  This bit was good fun actually - throwing mud against a wall is quite therapeutic!  Tin sheets have been put on as a roof and wooden doors and windows.  I think the exterior walls will also be cemented, depending on money, which would make them more able to withstand the rain.  The woman has malaria at the moment, and didn't look at all well.  Again she was thankful to God, and thanked us for our help.

Someone we met this week asked if we'd transformed any lives yet, given we're called the Transform Team.  It made me wonder if I'm really helping anyone or am I doing something in order to make myself feel good?  Who is really being transformed here?  A book I was reading the other week (Shane Claiborne - The Irresistible Revolution) talked about putting faces to problems such as poverty and how this breaks down the walls of separation between 'us' and 'them'.  I would hope that the work I'm involved with here is doing some good, but I'm also realistic about it - I'm pretty sure the longer term impact will be on my life.  I'm becoming increasingly aware that my time here in Rwanda is running out (about 7 weeks left) and I want to make the most of it.  There's a lot I still want to work on in my own life as well as enjoying being here in Rwanda and finding ways to help the people we meet.

Tomorrow we leave for Cyangugu and then move onto Kigeme on the 27th May before going back to Cyakabiri on the 8th June for our last month.  Overall I've enjoyed being in Butare.  Ok, so the water being off for the majority of our time here, the mosque with loud 5am prayer calls nearby, the spider infestation in my room and more insect bites haven't been ideal...  But the friendly welcome, increased independence, ice cream shop, washing our own clothes, a visit to the national museum, meeting students from the university, an english speaking church service and joining an english speaking Bible study group have been great!  People joked with us that we would all get stalkers here in Butare - the only thing attracted to me here seems to be fleas, not boys, but that's ok!  I managed not to wash my hair for 7 days - a big achievement for me (I wash, blow dry and straighten my hair everyday at home)!  My hair felt horrible and greasy but I've surprised myself by not feeling too bothered about it.  Wondering how else I could challenge and push myself, such as talking more to people rather than writing about how I feel.

As always I'm grateful for the comments and for people who ask mum and dad how I'm getting on.  Felt quite homesick last weekend, but I'm doing ok now.

Prayer points would be:
- confidence in myself and being able to talk more to others
-safety in travel, especially round Cyangugu where the roads are meant to be quite bad in places
-more opportunities to serve and help others

Eating my words

Well, after writing on my last blog post that I would like to learn how to live a more uncomfortable life, we have come to Butare where there is no running water and I have been getting more bites again!  I think it's probably good for me.  Trying to see how long I can last for without washing my hair (a big thing for me).  The contrasts of life here in Rwanda seems more apparent in Butare, which is a university town.  It only takes a short drive from the centre of Butare to find families living in mud made houses, or living in a church because they have been made homeless.  It makes me appreciate the life I have at home - as well as frustrated and challenged over the unfairness of life. 

Last weekend we were at a wedding - an interesting experience.  There were no cows unfortunately - just someone dressed to represent the cow.  We've also celebrated Sarah's birthday and started our month of travelling.  It's good to see new places.

Just a short post today, hope to write more soon.  Thanks for post, comments and continued prayers. x

Comfortably uncomfortable

As I think I’ve said before, in theory I love the idea of travelling.  But the reality of power cuts, water cuts, bugs, bites, language barriers, lack of space and freedom does sometimes get to me!  (Although we are taken care of and looked after so well, so don't feel too sorry for me!)  I don’t like feeling uncomfortable and I miss the ease and familiarity of life at home.  But didn’t I come here because I wanted to challenge myself and step out of that comfort zone?  Life at home had become uncomfortably comfortable – it was easy just to float along in life.  Instead, I would like to get to the point where I feel comfortably uncomfortable.  As in actively choosing a lifestyle that doesn’t follow the easy and straightforward path.  Being able to embrace different and difficult situations.  I think there’s a lot more I could be doing to push myself further out of my comfort zones.  Easier said than done!

Someone took me aside the other week and asked me if I was ok, as I was so quiet – was there something wrong?  As kind as it was for them to have noticed me and asked, I did feel a bit upset about it.  I hate being quiet and shy, and don’t like that people often assume something must be wrong.  People are different in the way they show their emotions.  I know it’s another thing I could be working on.  I worry that many of my bad qualities are coming out while here (eg. my lack of tolerance, insecurities, a bit uptight, quick to get frustrated etc).  Where is the balance between changing things about your personality and learning to accept yourself?  I often feel inadequate and still wonder why I’m here in Rwanda and part of this team.

Activities-wise, things have been fairly quiet.  A couple of weeks ago we went to the genocide memorial in Kigali.  I really didn’t know what to expect from it, but it was informative, well laid out, respectful, thought provoking, shocking and deeply upsetting.  I’m glad we visited, but it was also very good when we left – I couldn’t take much more of it.  The next day we went on a trip to Kibuye, by Lake Kivu.  The drive there was incredible – amazing scenery!  We stopped off at an impressive waterfall, but the best bit had to be the first glimpses of Lake Kivu.  The sun was setting, the light was amazing and it was beautiful and exciting to see the water.  We stayed over at a place run by nuns, then on the Saturday took a boat trip out to Napoleon Island, which is home to several thousand fruit bats and a herd of cows (yes really!).  It was good to go out and about, but also nice to come back to Cyakabiri (where we live) – it feels very familiar now.  Next week we will be travelling to Butare, Cyangug & Kigeme for almost 5 weeks.  I’m looking forward to seeing more of Rwanda and learning more about the people.

Last Saturday we took part in ‘Umuganda’, which is where people do community work on the morning of the last Saturday of the month.  We dug holes for and planted passion fruit trees.  I’ve had the fabric I bought made into trousers!  I’ve worn them to church here but I think they might just be pyjamas when I get home – they’re pretty crazy and bright!  The woman who made them works at the ‘Youth At Risk’ project next door to us.  Watching her churn out clothes and make alterations actually made me want to use my sewing machine again – something I haven’t felt like doing for a long time!  Given how I usually feel about being creative, I take this as a good sign!  I also taught the other girls how to make origami birds and did some mending of clothes.  This was perhaps the first time I really felt I was contributing something to the group.  It would be so good if I could go home with a more positive attitude to my creative skills (did I just admit I have creative skills?!).  Yesterday we had 2 amazing treats - homemade pizza (first time I've had cheese since leaving home) and a lesson on how to make samosas (complicated, don't get your hopes up mum!)!

I didn’t get a place on the CAP internship program.  I’m disappointed and don’t have the means to get feedback, so am not sure why.  At the same time, there’s not a lot I can do about looking or applying for something else while here.  I’m pleasantly surprised by the fact that I’m not really stressed and worked up about it.  Obviously the thought of going home with no idea of what the future holds isn’t ideal, but it’s not a disaster.  I’ve been thinking of Proverbs 3: 5-6 ‘Trust in the Lord with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding. Seek his will in all you do, and he will direct your paths’.  Hoping my parents aren’t too worried that I will be living with them forever?!

Prayer points would be:

-          That I wouldn’t worry about the future, instead trusting that God has something else in store for me (career advice/ job offers are welcome!)

-          That I would stop getting insect bites.  I’ve had over 50 in the past couple of weeks.  It’s pretty unpleasant waking up at night knowing you’re getting bitten but not knowing what it is, not being able to see them and not knowing how to stop it.  I’m getting better at not scratching but it would be nice if I didn’t get many/any more bites for a while!  Other than that I’m keeping healthy.

-          That I would continue to challenge myself but also give myself a break – it’s unrealistic to expect to change overnight and I could do with learning to accept myself a bit more, warts and all.  Where is that balance?

-          For safety as we travel around Rwanda from 8^th May till 8^th June.

Thanks again for reading my blog and for those who have left comments.  It means a lot to me!  Sorry I've not been able to regularly update it. Thanks also for the promises of post.  I’ve received 3 cards so far, which is lovely – it’s so special to hear from home.  (Congrats to Lynsey Stewart for being the first, second prize goes to Jennifer Morris)  I’m not sure how much if any internet access I’ll have from next week.  Will try to update the blog, or get mum and dad to do it for me.